Sita was the daughter of King Janaka. The king was very protective over his daughter and was extremely selective about who would get to marry her. He had heard of Rama. He knew that Rama was virtuous and strong with a noble heart. He thought perhaps that Rama could be fit to marry his daughter, but there was only one way to find out.
In order to marry Princess Sita, one had to engage in a challenge. There was a maze arranged in Janaka's kingdom. The maze's sole purpose was to select the chosen one who would marry Sita. Janaka had no control over who would win the maze. The maze was all-knowing and would test each man in ways that it knew would break them. Anyone who completed the maze was considered wise and powerful enough to marry the finest princess in the land.
On one fateful day, Rama received a letter. The letter glistened and gleamed when he opened it and Rama immediately knew that this was no ordinary message. He soon realized that he had been invited to compete in the maze for Sita's love. Ecstatic, he ran without stopping all the way to Janaka's kingdom. Rama knew that the maze was relentless. Men had been injured both physically and mentally from the things the maze was capable of. Most importantly, no one had ever completed it. Rama didn't care about the dangers and challenges of the maze. He would do anything to win Sita's heart.
When he arrived at the kingdom, King Janaka was waiting for him, sitting atop a throne. Standing below him were three other strong, determined men, who Rama realized were also fighting for Sita's love. The king informed the four men that a magical ring lay at the center of the maze. If any man were to reach it, he would be transported back to the king, who would then allow him to gift his daughter with the ring. At that, the men began stretching and preparing for the maze. At the king's demand, all four men entered the maze from different entries. The walls of the maze were made of vines that reached out and tried to grab the competitors. The walls reached so high, they seemed to touch the heavens. The maze was pitch black, lit with a faint eerie glow. Around each corner were traps and rakshasas, ready to fight and deter the men. Rama fought tirelessly for hours. His body was growing weaker, but his mind stayed strong. He knew that any sign of weakness could hinder him from winning his true love.
Throughout the night, Rama heard screams and wails of the other contestants. The screams lessened as time went on. He wondered if they were exiting the race. Then, a vine from the walls reached out and wrapped around his neck. Caught off guard, Rama was thrown to the ground. Using every last ounce of energy, he finally broke free from the vine. Tired, wounded, and struggling to breathe, Rama was not sure if he could stand back up. Just when he questioned whether or not he could go on, he heard the most beautiful noise. The noise was the purest voice singing the most beautiful melody. When he looked up, he realized that this must be the voice of his true love.
Rama jumped into action, and ran full-speed toward the voice, slashing through vines and letting nothing stop him. The noise was growing louder and he began to see a faint light in the distance. He ran toward the light and sound, and found what he knew was the magical ring. He looked around, trying to find the source of the music...but no one was there. Quickly, he grabbed the ring and was transported back to the beginning of the maze.
There he saw a tearful King Janaka and an overjoyed Princess Sita.
"Rama, son of Dasharatha!" King Janaka exclaimed. "You have succeeded at a task that many men before you have tried and failed! You and only you are worth of marrying my beloved daughter. I know that you will protect her just as I have protected her for all these years."
And with that, Rama presented Sita with the ring. Sita looked as beautiful as the day Rama first laid eyes on her. Her dark hair waved in the wind and a tear glistened down her beautiful, smiling face. Rama knew that every trial, both mental and physical, from the maze was well worth it. He would do it again in a heartbeat. He would do anything for Sita.
(The maze that a man must fight in order to win Sita's love. WikiMedia)
Author's Note: This story was inspired by the chapter "Rama Wins Sita" in the Public Domain Edition of The Ramayana. In the original story, Rama must bend Shiva's bow in order to win Sita, the woman he is in love with. This is the challenge set in place by her father, King Janaka. Of course, Rama breaks the bow and wins Sita. It was a relatively short story, so I wanted to change it up and make it longer. If you are a Harry Potter fan, you might have noticed that my story was inspired by the maze in the Triwizard Tournament from Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I thought that incorporating one of my favorite movies into this story would be a fun twist. Since they both had elements of magic, it was fun to put them together. This was my first time to create my own story from an Indian epic, so using elements from another story made it a little easier for me. I enjoyed having the ability to morph one of my favorite movie scenes into this story. This helped me to realize how easy it can be to change up a story and how fun it can be!
Bibliography:
Public Domain Ramayana: Rama Wins Sita
Considering I am a huge Harry Potter fan (who's not????) I loved your story!! You're idea of incorporating a maze into the story was genius. This is a type of story where you could make it longer by adding actual obstacles he had to go though within the maze to get to the ring. Maybe even incorporate the bow he had to pick up or another object like an axe or sword as a surprise challenge even after he finished the maze.
ReplyDeleteI read King Janaka's instructions over the ring and immediately thought, "I know I've read something like this before." I think this was a very clever way to integrate a modern epic with an ancient one from another culture. Rama often faces physical challenges (such as breaking the bow), but he doesn't seem to face challenges of cleverness as often. This story gives a more rounded perspective of Rama, something that I thoroughly enjoy.
ReplyDeleteI hate to just parrot the comments of Corbin and Candace, but I think I have to. It was a really fun read. I like that it tested him in determination more than physical prowess. Incorporating the maze from Harry Potter was also great. I like Candace's idea of expanding it if you ever get the itch to do so. I'd like to see where else you could take it. Good job!
ReplyDeleteI love Harry Potter, so I would really love to see more stories like this! If you ever get the chance, I would love to see a Harry Potter/Ramayana mix. I really love the call back to the Triwizard Tournament maze and even the Great Hall ceiling. I'm wondering what happened to the other contestants though? I hope they didn't all die! Also I really like how the ring was a trophy just like in Harry Potter! Honestly I just really appreciate all of the Harry Potter references in here. This is the second Portfolio story about Rama and Sita's love story I've read and I really like how both you and Grant changed the challenge from Shiva's bow. I like your interpretation with the maze testing endurance too. All in all great story and I really hope you continue mixing Harry Potter and the Ramayana! Can't wait to read the rest of your stories!
ReplyDeleteThe way some of the little details in your story line up with the story of the Ramayana is really neat--for example, the fact that the maze had never been beaten before, just like Shiva's bow had never been moved before Rama came along. The Triwizard-esque element of the story was really engaging, too; I think combining two really familiar tales worked well for you.
ReplyDeleteThere are a couple of places that you might be able to fill out to make your story even more engaging. At the very beginning, we see Rama fall in love at first sight, after which he is utterly committed to conquering the maze to win her hand. What might it have been about Sita that captured his love so completely, I wonder? By adding a sentence or so describing the circumstances behind which he first saw Sita and fell in love with her (Was she doing her hair? playing with a palace girl? thinking aloud as she walked through a garden? What would capture Rama's interest the most?), you might make both of their characters a little fuller. That would also help us root for Rama even more as he makes his way through the maze!
The maze is a really cool device. You say that it can "test each man in ways that it knew would break them". What special mental challenge might your Rama face, based on your understanding of his character? What might unexpectedly help him overcome it?
Lastly, you left me really curious about the singing voice coming from the ring! Was it Sita's after all? If so, how did she manage to project her voice into the maze--and did she do it just for Rama? (Maybe she was hoping he would win, too!)
Thanks for the story, Bentleigh!
A maze! Yes! I loved that you changed the "test" that Rama had to go through. And the maze has properties like the sorting hat from Harry Potter -- it's all knowing, and has the autonomy to choose for the person entering the maze. As I read on, I realized that you were actually using the maze from Harry Potter -- so you incorporated two important magical events from Harry Potter, well done!
ReplyDeleteThe maze is Sita's "Swayamvara"! Did you know that word? I learned it from Week 5's Reading of the Mahabharata, where the Pandavas (5 brothers) go to Draupadi's swayamvara, where Arjuna, too, has to pass a test in order to win Draupadi as a wife.
Oh No! He ran all day to Janaka's kingdom to START the maze that evening?! Wouldn't he have worn himself out before the maze began its relentless test? This was worrisome when I read it... what would happen if you changed the date to a month after he received the letter, so the fact that he is already worn out from the journey isn't a problem? Or can you expound on the fact that despite starting out the maze tired from the journey, he still manages to win?
Wow, *millions* of men have tried to win Sita as their bride, and have failed? When did they allow men to start trying? The day she was born? How old is she? How did enough time pass to allow so many men to compete for her heart? Could you expand on this? This leaves too many questions unanswered. At the very least, what would happen if Rama's title as winner was not just "Husband to Sita" but also "He Who Beat Millions" or something catchy like that? ;)
Very cool! Two magical worlds collided into one story, making it a very enjoyable read, since I was trying to figure out what elements you would include and which elements you would leave out. Nicely done, and nicely written!
I like how you decided to elaborate on a small section of the bigger story! I think a lot of people just look at the section as “he won her and now what’s next”. I like how you not only elaborated on it but also made it a twist. I just have a few comments on some things that stuck out to me:
ReplyDeleteParagraph 3: there was a lot of repetition of the word “maze” and the flow of the words were somewhat difficult to follow.
I think paragraph 4 and half of 5 should be one paragraph and “When we arrived at the kingdom…” would be your new paragraph. So paragraph 6 would combine with the rest of paragraph 5.
Paragraph 6: do we know these men?
I love the imagery you used for the inside of the maze!
I like how you ended this story. It showed how the king wanted Rama to be the one to marry his daughter and how Sita had already in love with Rama.
I really liked how you took something that was merely touched on in the book, and managed to create such a beautiful story out of it. I also really enjoyed the twist in the story. I agree with Shifa the imagery in paragraph 6 was incredible. I almost felt as though I was there as well. I liked that you decided that Rama needed to take a different version of the test. I thought it made the story even more unique. It did, however, remind me of Harry Potter. I am not sure if that is what you were inspired by but having read Harry Potter as a child it brought back some great memories. I have tried to watch the movies for Harry Potter, but I didn't feel that they lived up to the books as they should. Great job with your story!
ReplyDeleteI love the link between Harry Potter and the Ramayana! I am still waiting on my acceptance letter to Hogwarts. :) I love how creative the story was, and how you were able to weave the story together into the template from Goblet of Fire. I think that, in the future, you could try to vary your sentence structure a little bit. You have a lot of simple sentences (especially in the beginning) and creating a more complex combination of sentences might give the story a more complicated and nuanced cadence to it. With regards to the story, I wonder what happened after he won Sita's hand! We know from the original story that winning the love of Sita was the least of anyone's problems... it would be awesome if you situated the next story (or stories) about the couple in the Harry Potter universe. Maybe the next story takes place in Azkaban?
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your retelling of this story. I think it was a great idea to combine the story of Rama fighting for Sita’s hand with the Goblet of Fire’s final trial. I would never have thought of that combination, but it works really well!
ReplyDeleteHowever, you did have a few things that stood out to me. Two of your phrases, ‘select the chosen one’ and ‘pitch black, lit with a faint eerie glow’ are a little redundant. Maybe change it to reveal the chosen one? And then pitch black but glowing doesn’t really make much sense. I understand the point that you’re trying to get across, but it doesn’t quite sound right. The only other thing that really stood out to me was the comma splice you have in the last paragraph. The sentence should read: Rama knew that every trial from the maze, both mental and physical, was well worth it.
I really hope you write another story from the Harry Potter perspective. I’m really curious to see what other book/movie you’ll choose to draw from!
After reading that this had inspirations from Harry Potter, there was no possible way I could ignore this story. Like you mentioned in your author's note, Rama's task to win the heart of Sita was a fairly short and simple task even though it was a very important event in the epic. I'm sure this is also because Rama is absolutely magnificent, but it was still very short. The fact that you were able to add much more detail and longevity to this task was simply genius. I was hoping to read a story like this and I'm happy this is the story I read over this topic. It was even a challenge for Rama which means this is an extremely difficult task. Overall, this was a very strong piece to add to your portfolio. I can't wait to check back later in the semester to see the completed portfolio. Great work!
ReplyDeleteWithout even reading your story, I really love the background of your blog! It gives it a very mystical mysterious vibe and makes me even more excited to read your story! I like the story you picked because I feel like there are so many ways to rewrite it and reinterpret it. Its fascinating to see how people take the story and reshape it in so many ways! I really liked your retelling of the story because of how visually everything is written. You add so many pretty words that really show me what the characters are seeing and feel what they are feeling, I love stories like that! I also like that you kept all of the original names because it makes it easier to remember what happened in the original story and then to grasp more fully exactly what may have been happening in the story. Great job! Can't wait to read more!
ReplyDeleteHi Bentleigh! Wow, this story was incredible! I love the way that you mixed in Harry Potter. Just like pretty much everyone ever (unless their crazy), who doesn't love Harry Potter! I never thought of relating Rama to Harry, but since you have, I totally see just how much this works! They both overcome ridiculous tasks, both get help from higher powers, and they both have to kill people who have been practically immortal! As I was reading, I was very curious as to what was going on in Sita's mind. Was she able to watch as four men vying for her love were being defeated by a magical maze? Also, did she really want Rama to win and so she helped him, but didn't help any of the others? I was also wondering if Sita's father was thinking if maybe the maze was a little too harsh and whether or not he was worried no one would be able to complete it. It would be fun to be able to explore their thoughts possibly in another story. Like I said, this story was absolutely incredible! Great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Bentleigh! I was looking through the different portfolios to make my third choice for the week, and you most certainly caught my eye with Harry Potter-themed, haha. This was an amazing story; I think you did an excellent job incorporating the Triwizard Tournament into the swayamvara, since often times the swayamvaras involved some kind of ridiculously difficult task. Perhaps this kind of maze was a bit too extreme, but even so, it was an interesting concept. I really enjoyed how you portrayed Rama as a courageous and perseverant man, just like he was during his search for Sita. Also, it was a nice touch that the final thing that drew him to the finish was Sita's voice; I think it definitely enhances their love story and is going to be an interesting "how I met your mother" story down the road. :)
ReplyDeleteHi, Bentleigh! My favorite genres of reading are horror and romance so I definitely enjoyed your story. I am actually one of the few people on this earth that are not a fan of harry potter, unfortunately. However, even without knowing about harry potter, I still found your story to have many great components to it. I love how you still chose to stick to most of the original plot while changing it up a bit. Your descriptions of Sita really helped the audience to her through Rama’s eyes.
ReplyDelete“The maze was pitch black, lit with a faint eerie glow.”
-Although I can understand exactly what you’re trying to describe here, I still found it just a bit confusing how you first said that the maze was pitch black but then you proceeded to say it was lit with a faint glow, those two sentences just seem contradictory to me. Maybe you could revise this to say, “The maze was dark and ominous, without only a faint eerie glow to lead the way”.
Other than that, your story was amazing. Keep up the good work.
This was a great story! I remember reading the original story “Rama Wins Sita” and I think this is a very interesting variation on that story. I had also written one of my stories based on this story. I found this story to be a very fun one to alter and I think you did a great job of mixing “Rama Wins Sita” with the scene from the “Goblet of Fire.” Your story also reminded me in parts of the movie “The Maze Runner” that came out a few years ago but that is probably because I have not seen the Harry Potter movie you referenced. This story was very well written and I did not find any grammatical errors or spelling errors. I did however find one sentence that could use a bit of revising: “The maze was pitch black, lit with a faint eerie glow.” This sentence is a bit confusing because it cannot be both pitch black and have a faint glow.
ReplyDeleteI have never experienced harry potter but from what I have heard about it you did a good job. I think this was a very interesting rendition of the story and it made me want to read or watch harry potter. There were a few times I got a bit confused at but that could have been the fact that I have never experienced Harry potter. There were also a few grammatical errors that I caught but nothing majorly wrong with this piece. I would love to read another piece like this if you were planning or if you have written one. I think it was a unique spin that you couldn’t have made much better. Overall great job and keep writing. You did a great job!
ReplyDeleteThis was a really fun read! I loved the connection and linking you made between the Ramayana and Harry Potter. I remember reading the original Rama and Sita and actually wrote a story based off of it as well. I found it to be great story to write about or retell. I found this story to be very well written and did not contain any errors. I really enjoyed this story, keep up the great work!
ReplyDeleteI am embarrassed to admit that I haven't seen Harry Potter. I have been meaning to have marathon but just haven't made time for it yet! After reading your story, though, I think I need to get on that. I loved this story. The imagery you added to describe the maze was fantastic. You had me so intrigued the entire time. I only noticed two typos that need to be fixed. Reading out loud has always helped me catch things like this!!
ReplyDelete"Her long, dark hair shined under the sun and everything about her seemed effortless and wonderful."
It should say "shone" instead of "shined". I am not sure if shined is a word but shone sounds better to me there!
"You and only you are worth of marrying my beloved daughter."
Here I think you meant to put "worthY of marrying my beloved daughter".
I really thought you did a phenomenal job with this story. It is clear that you are a very strong writer and I look forward to reading more of your stories in the future!
I really enjoyed this piece! I liked the unique twist that you put on the story line. I have never seen harry potter but it did remind me of the maze runner and that story line. I think that you made it interesting for the reader and kept them involved throughout the whole story. There were a few grammatical errors or sentences that maybe could be worded a bit differently. Overall I think you wrote a great piece and I would love to read more of your writing!
ReplyDeleteHello Bentleigh! Wow I loved this story! I am a huge fan of Harry Potter and I thought the blending of both of the stories were great! You were able to keep the completion of a near impossible task to win over Sita while making it completely your own story! I liked how you added a lot of detail to this story so that it was very easy to get a mental picture of what was going on with Rama. Almost so that I could see him fighting through huge vines that were trying to kill him before he accomplished his goal! What I also found to be interesting about your variation of this story was that you had a lot of action going on that wasn’t at all in the original or in any other variation of this story this semester! I loved the fact that you used the teleportation idea from Harry Potter as well! Great job on this story I really enjoyed the read!
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